FIRST PERSON FIRST SIGHTING ALL EDITIONS

• Published in: Newsday
• Main Author: BY JASON ALEXANDER. Jason Alexander is a pseudonym
• Format: Newspaper Article
• Language: English
• Published: Long Island, N.Y Newsday LLC 27.04.1986
• Edition: Combined editions

The only time I saw [Susan] was when I went to pick up [Jesse]. I had Jesse one day a week and every other weekend. Was it my fault I worried so much about my little girl? After all, how did I know what she did when I wasn't around. So I nagged a little bit, so what? Susan said I could wear a person down like the grind of a tedious job. 'M SORRY," I wanted to explain. "I just can't get used to not having Jesse around all the time. The thought of her maybe not being safe." I wanted to say that, but never did. I was half-crazy watching Jesse all alone, without an adult (me, preferably) at her side, reminding her of the danger of cars. Someone, I thought, should be there to throw himself in front of one of those cars, if need be. Who else would be that except her father? Don't rush to judgment, I reminded myself. Try to think things through, the way the counselor had advised me. Don't overreact! No doubt Susan was just a step behind Jesse, in the Carvel or maybe the deli next door. But she was nowhere around at this moment. What would be the harm, I thought, of just going over and talking to Jesse? An accidental meeting. Very innocent. And I could be at her side until Susan came out. After moving out, I had made it a point to avoid all the familiar places where I might run into Jesse and Susan. Grocery shopping at the local supermarket, for one. Or driving by the school yard on sunny afternoons on the way home from work. I told myself there was good reason for this; it would be an awkward encounter. Jesse might ask why I wasn't going home with them.