Education: If you ask me

• Published in: The Guardian (London)
• Main Author: Dr Kevin Conway, Ingrid Sutherland, Sheryl Waters and Rachel Cashman
• Format: Newspaper Article
• Language: English
• Published: London (UK) Guardian News & Media Limited 26.09.2000
• ISSN: 0261-3077

Generally 16-year-olds will vote with their feet, and it is difficult to force them to do anything they don't want to do. I suggest you investigate if there are any underlying causes for his disaffection. Obviously there is the influence of his friends, but there could be other reasons. A-levels require a lot of independent work; perhaps he is panicking about the transition into a different way of studying. There might be a hidden cause - a relationship problem or a clash with a teacher. In terms of parental action, it is difficult with teenagers. They could suggest that he speaks to his course co-ordinator or a careers adviser, or even a teacher he gets on well with. I would not suggest speaking directly to the school without their son's permission, but they could perhaps have a meeting including their son, about how they could all work together to help. Don't approach this subject in concrete terms - use words like might and may, so that he doesn't feel he is being lectured. This needs to be done as a conversation, with the son being encouraged to put his side. Ask him why he is feeling like this. Ultimately the parents must say that whatever he decides, they will support him - but that they feel it would be a huge waste of potential not to finish his A-levels. Perhaps, depending on the family's financial situation, they could say that if, at times, his friends are going to a concert or whatever and he can't afford to, they would try their best to help him.